simply love.

holy buckets of love.
literally. haha. its crazy. i was hit with it on thursday. its amazing, how one can be in a puddle, a pitious puddle of no hope headed straight for the nothingness of darkness, and along comes someone else, even better a group of people just like you. and they share a story of similar dispair. and your puddle dries up and becomes a cloud again. that instantly. crazy, i tell you! love is so...blah! a miracle in itself. because it's also God. and i'm starting to sort of grasp kind of this love He has for us. i was reading psalm 121 the other night, and i just sat there and read it over and over. it talks about how God never sleeps in order to keep us from falling, and how He is our only help. i guess its just a concept i've never come across before...i could just picture in my mind Jesus sitting by my bedside, watching me sleep...such like a tender thing.
once love is remembered, nothing makes sense, but it does at the same time. you can feel like you completely know nothing, but with love you have all the understanding ever and more. i'm starting to read The Shack and its stinkin awesome. i love the quote in there:

"there are times when you choose to believe something that would normally be considered absolutely irrational. it doesn't mean that it is actually irrational, but it surely is not rational. Perhaps there is suprarationality: reason beyond the normal definitions of fact or data-based logic; something that makes sense only if you can see a bigger picture of reality. Maybe that is where faith fits in."

love it. love love love. nothing can take this away from me.